I can honestly say this week I have been frustrated with every aspect of my life. Work, friends, missing school, weight, my family….
Its always hard to keep eating correctly when I have so much anxiety over things. I know I mentioned in an earlier post I haven’t being treating my body correctly this week, mostly because I’m under a lot of pressure right now. I’m determined to forgive myself for a bad week, and vow to make the upcoming one better.
This past week I learned so much and I have seen how God is working in mysterious ways.
Wednesday I took my grandparents to bible study and they begged me to stay! I’m so glad I did because I felt like the pastor was talking directly to me!! He preached from 1 Timothy 4: 1-11. I’ve always wondered how God felt about my eating disorder. The Bible never says anything specifically about them. I know my body is a temple and that gluttony is bad, but I could translate that into “dont overeat and stay thin”. I seriously doubted that is what God wanted.
I was right!! The pastor said God doesn’t want us to over indulge in food, but also doesn’t want physical fitness to be our main goal. If we are so busy focusing on exercise/weight we are not fulfilling the purpose He has for us.
This really opened my eyes. God loves me,He wants me to enjoy things, but not so much I forget to serve him. One day we will leave these bodies behind and the only thing that will matter is if we loved God. Food should not be my idol, but neither should the treadmill or the scale.
Last night I got to go to the game AND WE WON!!! I also got the chance to hang out with some high school kids while I was there. Since I spent most of high school sick, I always wanted to go back. I’ve never wanted to grow up. NOT ANYMORE!! I forgot how immature high schoolers can be. I love them (my sister is one), but I’m so thankful I am in college. As miserable as I was hanging out with them, I’m glad it happened.
I’m thankful God was able to open my eyes so many more times this week!! Even though times are really tough right now, I’m reminded its all happening to make me a better person.
As usual I’m open to any advice on my crazy life!! I’m so excited for Dancing with the Stars to start back tomorrow along with a completely new Two and Half Men (with Ashton Kutcher!!)
Off to eat my dinner….