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I have considered starting a blog for a while now. I’ve lurked around the blogging community for over two years. I guess I’ve been a little scared to basically put my life out there for anyone with access to the internet. What if no one wants to read my blog? I’m such a perfectionist, that would be a major confidence blow. On the flip side, what if people do want to read this? They’ll end up finding out my most personal thoughts and feelings.

Essentially, I am a very private person. A VERY VERY private person. I have a lot of friends, but only one of them actually knows everything about me. I’ve always been scared that once people really got to know me they would decide they didn’t like me, and leave me. This type of thinking formed in middle school when some very pretentious girls decided I wasn’t good enough to hang out with them. This was due to some weight gain and the fact my parents weren’t as rich as theirs. Ever since then, I’ve kept my guard up to anyone and everyone I met.

Lately, I have learned that I’m not in high school anymore. All girls Most girls are not that immature anymore. I’ve learned that people actually respect you more if you are just upfront and honest. In fact,  some of my friendships became stronger because I’m open about the fact I’m not perfect. The fact that none of my friends are perfect either is actually something we all bond over. Plus, it doesn’t hurt to have someone to chat about life with, even the bad parts.

I’m hoping that by putting my thoughts out there, I’ll realize my problems are no different from everyone else’s. Maybe it will give me the confidence to show who I really am with everyone else.

I don’t really know what “kind” of blog this will be. I’m still in the stages of really growing (more on my story later though). Because of all the things I’ve been through with food and weight, I really want to do a food blog. I also love fashion and I think it’s so important to also include my relationship with God (because it’s constantly growing) in my writing. Basically this blog will be like me, all over the place.

Instead of a verse today, I want to leave you with a song that really goes with this post. Plus, the words have really helped me lately when I’ve felt my worst.This song reminds me that if I am good enough for my perfect and awesome God, even though He knows every bad thing I have ever done or will do, then I’m good enough for any human on this earth. Mighty to Save by The Newsboys